Q: What’s the difference between civil and mechanical engineers?
A: A mechanical engineer builds weapons, a civil engineer builds targets.
A mathematician tells a colleague his wife just had a baby.
“Is it a boy or a girl?”
I’m a dyslexic agnostic with insomnia… I lie awake at night wondering if there really is a dog!
Q: How much force does it take to stop a propeller?
A: About half a Newton.
Why is it that programmers always confuse Halloween with Christmas?
Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC.
One night, there’re sin, tan and cos together around a campfire, while e^x is all by himself. When someone asks him why he isn’t wit the other, e^x says: “I tried to integrate myself, but nothing ever happens.”
Q: Let’s say only you and dead people can read hex. If you teach your buddy how to read hex also, what do you all have in common?
A: You are all deaf.
A cop pulls over Dr. Heisenberg and says, “Sir, do you know how fast you were going?”
Dr. Heisenberg responds, “NO, but I know EXACTLY where I am”
Ascii stupid question, get a stupid Ansi!
How do you tell an extrovert engineer from an introvert? An extrovert engineer will look at your shoes when he talks to you.